I've met a couple guys, went on a few dates. And while they're all very nice and I have to say that I've been blessed to not receive any creepy messages or had to deal with abusive members, it's just not for me.
The past month I've had my account I've come to see that one of the main reasons I've remained single for so long (about 2 years now), is simply because I'm not ready to fully commit yet. I'm not ready to give myself to another person right now. Online dating is completely new and weird to me. I think a big problem for me is knowing that there is this expectation from the other person that we will be in a romantic relationship. That there will BE something more after the initial encounter. I am much more comfortable with being friends with someone and then a romantic interest developing over time. Would it be nice to have a guy to hang out with and have all the romantic stuff that comes with being in a relationship? Absolutely. But it's not a priority right now. It's not even a top 5 for me.
I am about halfway through the hiring process for Customs. I have an interview on the 13th and I am nervous because I got the FAQ's about this part of the process and it's weird as hell. But I'm excited because I'm ready to move forward. I have never wanted something more than this. This is my chance to accomplish my dream. To make all those years in school pay off. To live a happy life. I'm excited at the prospect of moving to Georgia and training.
I want all of that more than I want a boyfriend right now. And so while I'm not going to avoid male attention, and I may even go on a date here and there, I'm not going to actively seek out a romantic partner. Because I know one day it will happen. :)
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